How Not to Choose a Thesis Advisor!

This is another follow up on the critical issue of choosing a thesis advisor.

This advice only applies to someone who is genuinely interested in trying to learn something and does not apply to someone just looking for the easiest way to place the initials "PhD" after their name.

I have already mentioned that you should probably avoid a thesis advisor who somehow manages to publish an absurd number of publications each year, particularly as part of a large team.  You might get your name on some papers, and boost some sort of ranking, but if you're actually interested in learning something, run like hell. Being advised on a thesis is really more like a guild apprenticeship from the Middle ages. If  you can't relate to that, it's more like becoming an apprentice to a Jedi master. 

On paper these "head of a large team" characters look great, but they are sort of like a fighter who hasn't fought a real fighter in years and everyone is surprised when they are easily beaten...except all the people that knew that they hadn't been any good for years and placed profitable bets accordingly.

Obviously, you should also avoid someone who publishes infrequently or not all. It's hard to be generous with your own ideas when they are so few in number.

It was always cute when an undergraduate, or even a graduate student once, said they wanted me to direct their thesis. Sometimes they liked my approach to subjects, but I think it was mainly just because they felt comfortable and I didn't make them feel stupid.  I told them that it was nice of them to ask, but that it was an absolutely terrible idea, that I was a good person to get started with as an undergraduate, but that you need to find someone who has lots of ideas, likes students, has an active research program in an area you like, and publishes reasonably frequently.

By way of counter-example, I would relay the story of how I chose my first thesis advisor.

He partly chose me actually.

I was standing in a nearby male stand up stall in the restroom, taking care of business, and I heard someone say, "Hey, would you be interested in  taking a course in TOPIC X?"

I was interested in many topics, including this one, so I said yeah sure.

I took the course, and the truth is that it was well taught and interesting, so I asked him if he would direct a thesis in this area and he said sure...and it went downhill from there.

I don't think it was all his fault actually, more of an incompatibility, kind of like a no-fault marriage.

I probably should have checked to see how many successful PhD students he had directed in his lengthy career. I am not positive, but the number may have turned out to be exactly ONE and I helped him maintain that almost perfect record.

Anyway, the moral is don't talk to people in the restroom, and do a little research whenever you are making decisions with long term serious ramifications.